An Enlightened Editorial

From the Desk of Mary Tarzan

Dr. Mary Tarzan is Governor of the State of Ponderada, and holds a PhD in Astronomical Physics. See, and you didn’t believe that hot girls could be smart. Man, you’re shallow and naïve.

Recently, there have been reports of war, or war-related happenings throughout the various locations, which, when viewed as a whole, combine to form that which we would describe or categorize by the nomenclature “the World.”

Why must one group, or two or more allied groups, take up arms against a second group, or grouping of alternately allied groups? Do their religions or ethnic makeup differ so significantly that armed conflict becomes the best of the available policy options? Perhaps the antecedent of disagreement is different attitudes held toward the nature of government, vis-à-vis city-states versus a federal system, or perhaps it is something even more fundamental, such as differing economic levels, caste, or colour of sash. One could dare say that perhaps it is as petty as resources; i.e., one group possessing a scare resource while the other group wishes to take and keep it as their own.

It saddens me to a degree which is deep to think on the subject of war and war-related occurrences. Death, wounding, maiming, incapacitation, destruction, endesolation and horrible horrors are hardly a fit subject around which one can wrap his or her well apt mind.

As for me, I shall instead choose a more enwelling mental preoccupation; one which is far more enriching than conflict, war and war-related conflicts. Indeed, I shall focus my mental thoughts on the natural beauty and wonder of the sublime tractor. Oh, shall joy unceasing be liken unto a well guarded possession for me and those like me who choose tractors as their subject for conjecture and discourse.

Behold the glories of Earth and Heavens! Behold! A tractor shines forth. Lo, for tractors may be places in that set of things which can be defined by the shared attribute that is the quality or condition of being cool.