Dear Axes & Alleys,
Yesterday, as I glanced through the New York City Police Auxiliary Hand-book, I came upon a section concerning self-defense. It featured instructions for officers; detailing how to break holds and maneuver out of an assailant’s grip. It occurred to me that it would make more sense to coat all police officers in a thick coat of oil or gelatin, either by dipping or by shower-type systems. Thus police would be too slippery for assailants to grab We can even have a series of way stations throughout the city where police officers can dunk under gelatin showers to refresh their slippery coatings. Perhaps Axes & Alleys could champion this idea so we can help stamp out crime forever.
Theory Ragdoll
Staten Island, NY

A&A,
Damn.
Juliet
London, UK

Dear Editors:
It is a shame that with all the new Amendments passed not one addressed he issue of robotic citizenship. Robots are fine helpers, both around the house and on industrial supply lines. Surely a robot with a 500 gig or more processor would have the power to understand the complex issues of our day. I mean, if we give women, the Irish and even Catholics the vote, we should support robot suffrage.
Almond Pepperidge
Tallahassee Tennessee
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