The Montsylvania College of Agricultural Technology Design Arts is a place where young minds can grow into slightly older minds in an enriching atmosphere of pure enriching enrichment.

At MCATDA we pride ourselves on our commitment to academic excellence, while at the same time allowing our students a plethora of activities, sports, and laundry facilities. Our campus includes the most modern technology available, including washers, dryers and ironing board areas.

Weather your looking for a career in science, art, scientific arts, or artistic sciences, MCATDA is the most best place to be wear you can get a degree in alot of exiting feilds to help you get a job with.

College is a time for learning. In order to facilitate this, we have devised our own special patented system of induced learning which you will only find here at the Montsylvanian College of Agricultural Technology Design Arts.

Each student is required to participate in a series of learning sessions which we call “Classes.” During the course of each of these “Classes,” an expert we have hired to profess their knowledge will stand in a room and speak for a period of time about the subject in which they are an expert.

Students will be required to remember the important parts of these speeches. to ensure that they remember, it is suggested that students bring a pencil or pen and paper to class to write down the gist of the expert’s speech.

From time to time, these experts will give the learners a paper, upon which are printed questions concerning the expert’s speeches. Learners will be rated according to how well they are able to provide the answer to these questions from memory.

Other learning-related activities will include having the learners read books related to the subjects upon which the experts profess their knowledge. The learners will be required to write their own collection of information based upon the information in the books.

After four years of these activities, the learners will receive a certificate of diplomacy and will be granted the honor of Bachelorhood. In order to participate in these activities, potential learners will be required to give the college a certain amount of monies. After said payment, learners will be given the choice of subjects upon which they want to base the majority of their learning.

Majors Available at MCATDA

Bernard Borden School of Science and Alchemy

• Radio-Zoology
• Arithmetic
• Histronomy
• Applied Metaphysics
• Cryonics
• Commuter Science
• Agricultural Psychology
• Imagineering
• Geo-mathematics
• Quantum Agriculture
• Astrogation
• Granulation Technology
• Hydro-genetic Engineering
• Vegetable Husbandry

Reverend Wolfpatty School of Divinity

• Theosophy
• Demonology
• Zen Judaism

Bester College of Belgian Studies

• Belgian Literature
• Belgian Children’s Literature

Borden (no relation) School of the Liberal Arts

• Amish Studies
• Voodoo Economics
• Sopwith Camel Studies
• Esperanto
• Noticing Things
• Political Alchemy
• Slavic Geology
• Hermaphrodite Studies
• Television Viewing
• Undead American Studies
• John Hollis (Lobot) Studies
• Philatelics
• Yodeling History
• Chronology
• Histrology
• Chinology
• Post-Classical Hermitics
• Journalistics

Delores P. Grunion School of Sports Science

• Aerial Croquet
• Aquatic Badminton

Jim Rosen School of Fine Arts

• Tim Conway Impersonation
• Cyborg Choreography
• Xerographic Arts
• Nude Fashion Design
• Arts and Crafts
• Theremin Performance
• Vest Making
• 5-D Design
• Rough Drafting

Joseph Stalin College of Professional Studies

• Arts and Crafts Administration
• Simian Administration
• Clam Repair/Maintenance
• Travel Agent Technology
• Pickling
• Bacon Festival Administration
• Pre-Custodial Studies
• Lobster Design

Horatio Nelson College of Medicine

• Bovine Gynecology
• Phrenology

At the Montsylvania College of Agricultural Technology Design Arts we don’t let the university experience stop at mere learning. We offer a wide variety of extra-curricular activities for every student, even those who are very boring.

Interested in music? There is our award winning musical group The Accordioneers. Now on their world-wide tour of Belgium and Iceland.

Here at the MCATDA we also offer many exciting sports including unicycle racing, free style unicycling, figure unicycling, and our intramural unicycling league. There is also a 43-Man Squamish Team.

Students can also do many exciting things like “surf” the interconnected network, play simulatory games, chat, work on projects and hang out in our brand new, state-of-the-art Computational Engine Laboratory, now featuring the new ENIAC systems.

So join Puffsto the Fighting Puffin, our beloved MCATDA mascot and become a part of the tradition of excellence and excitement that is Montsylvania College of Agricultural Technology Design Arts.

Montsylvania College of Agricultural Technology Design Arts Dean of Students Dr. Dave Soviet invites you to write us and receive even more informative information by mail.

for more information:

MCATDA Information Office
5116 Bunion Road Street Boulevard Suite 491,103,131,13
Bestoria, MV 991832
www.mcatda.edu

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