Axes & Alleys:
The World’s Greatest Tractor Related
Magazine. Now Featuring Tractors!
A Special Tractor Related Issue!
Axes & Alleys has received numerous letters over the years, which we often publish. Recently, a disturbing spate of letters decrying Axes & Alleys’ move away from tractor-related phenomena. This flow of negative energy has increased proportionally with the number of such issues published.
As Axes & Alleys’ new Editor-In-Chief and former cover girl, I vow to address these issues. While we will continue to publish content of various natures for the foreseeable future, we have decided to bring you, our readers, a special treat.
This month’s issue will be solely related to tractors, tractor history, tractor maintenance and tractor repair. Each subsequent issue will not follow this format, however we offer you this special, collector’s edition, full black and white spread.
Axes & Alleys’ readership and advertising sales have grown 2138% and twenty-fold respectively in the past year. Many of our readers are no longer interested in tractor repair and maintenance, as evidenced by the past seven letters sections. Furthermore, a growing number of our employees are drawn from non-tractorial fields. Axes & Alleys’ is only a magazine without its employees.
This issue is also new in that it is sponsored by AgroFarm™, a Daniel Bester, Inc. Company™. We felt a special issue required a special offer, so we brought AgroFarm™ into the fold with this one.
In addition to the normal journalistic content, you will find a special, subscribers-only extra. In addition to two unique covers, each magazine will also include a sample of AgroFarm™’s space-engineered microfertilizer or instructions on how to build your own nuclear powered farm or a genetically modified tuber from AgroFarm™’s parent company, NuLife, which can withstand the effects of aging.
xxx ooo
Delores R. Grunion