A Special Interview with the King of Norway!

by Air Marshall Sir William Douglas Hayes’…

…neighbor Tim.

Air Marshall Sir William Douglas Hayes

His Royal Majesty, King Hladir VI of the House of Uum

King Hladir of Norway ascended to the throne of Norway in 1978 and has since been a very fair and popular monarch; not the sort of mad, drunken, obese partying, fornicating monarch you expect to rule in, say, England. The other day I sat down with Hladir at the local Starbucks for a couple of delicious Superchococinoes and had a pretty good talk with him. He’s a really cool guy and I like him a lot.

TIM: So, how’s it going?

HLADIR: Hvorfor?

TIM: I said, how’s it going?

HLADIR: Angre på, ne prate English.

TIM: What?

HLADIR: Just kidding, I speak perfect English. After all, I am Head of State of a major Scandinavian nation.

TIM: Oh, that’s pretty good there, Hladir.

HLADIR: Please refer to me as Your Royal Norwegian Majesty.

TIM: Sorry, Y. R. N. M., so what’s-

HLADIR: Don’t abbreviate it, say the whole thing: Your Royal Norwegian Majesty.

TIM: No.

HLADIR: Masovnarbeider!

After that Hladir stormed out, but I think the experience was good and I had fun. Norway is cool!


Tim is currently a sophomore at East Falls Community College, where he hopes to earn his Associates Degree in Travel Agent Technologies.

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