Dear Sirs, Madam and other Sirs,
I am writing to you in order to secure more photographic pictorializations of Dave.
On page 18 of “Axes and Alleys” issue 17, you feature a collectible visual reference square of Dave. We in our family have grown quite accustomed to our photograph of Mr. Davey (as we call him). We bring him with us to the talking pictures, have him around at supper time and leave him to his private time in the mornings. We believe he performs relaxing meditations based upon Oriental philosophical concepts, but are unsure.
The point I am trying to make on behalf o fmy family and our Mr. Davey, is that we would like to see more of Dave in “Axes and Alleys.” If we could see an issue dedicated to all things Dave, it would keep us reading your publication and help us to achieve our dream. That dream would be to have an entirely Dave-themed home created from clippings of you fine publication. Also, if you have any additional photographs of Dave, please send them to us as soon as possible (ASAP).
Sincerely,
Mrs. P. Charles Umbridge IV
Wallachian Tractor Dismantling Service
To the Persons of Axes and Alleys,
I find that Encyclopedia Britannica contains many factual errors. I would therefore like to voice my favor of the Encyclopedia Trinidad and Tobagonica. It contains many exciting photographs of varmints.
Love,
Alfred Bester
P-12, Psi-Corps
Estimata Sinjoro,
Vi mosto skribi des pli artiklo en Esperanto. G’i est mirinda lingvo. Mi pensi traktoro ripari/konservado nova’jo est es pli interesa en Esperanto. Bonvolu fiksi tio c’i problemo nun.
Dankon,
Lester P. Grooms
Minister of Home Affairs
Federal republic of Esperon
To Whom it May Count:
I find that this publication is a bit too unbound by its utilization of that symbol “e.” Though it is a most commonly drawn upon symbol of our grouping of writing symbols, I do not support its location in publications or in any sort of communication. I would thank God if that awful and horrid symbol would on no account show up again in this good anthology of things. In no situation has that foul symbol found its way within any papyrus which contains our holy writings of Saint Paul within our Good Book. It should thus carry on with your publication. It is a most horrid symbol and our nation can do without its disgusting impact.
Yours Truly,
Timothy D. Young
World Consortium of Various Things