By the Great H. G. Peterson
H.G. Peterson is founder of the International
League of Lawn Mowing Visionaries, a group
devoted to creating a new age of lawn care for
all peoples of the world.
“The Future Never Happened”
Where’re the cities on the Moon?
Or the colonies in space.
Our wrist radios, Our paper clothes,
Or a peaceful human race?
Man, I’ve waited for so long
But damn, the Futurists were wrong.
Where are the cities under domes?
And those deep under the sea,
Flying cars and my jet pack,
Deadly ray guns that go “zap!”
Robot servants serving me?
And you know what really kills?
I never got proton energy pills!
All we got was CGI films,
And pointless camera phones,
Blogs across the internet,
Stuff I didn’t wanna get,
And reality TV shows.
Mad cow disease and terror attacks
Hey, I want my World’s Fair money back!
The world’s still full of doom and gloom
I just want to live on the Moon…really soon.